Al Gore’s Here. The World Can Climax Now.

The end of the world is a special time, and if you’re a special person, it may be the only time in all history appropriate for you.

This could explain the long tradition of the delusional and self-important proclaiming “THE END IS NEAR! REPENT!” The messenger is only as important as his message. And if your message is “The middle is here. Relax,” you might as well be announcing a company picnic.

No, if it’s meaning and purpose you seek, there’s just one moment that will do: the climax. Which brings us to Al Gore. Maybe you don’t associate the words “Al Gore” and “climax” like I do, but I want you to consider what a remarkable time Mr. Gore lives in.

The Earth is 4.5 billion years old. Life has squeaked by for almost 4 billion years. Hominids have existed for 4.5 million years. Modern man has lived for over 100,000 years. And civilization has somehow gotten by for nearly 10,000 years. But now in the blink of an eye represented by Al Gore’s fleeting 75-year lifespan, it is all coming to an end.

What a remarkable coincidence. And what a remarkable man. But then the hero always emerges in the final act.

It has been observed by more than one commentator that modern environmentalism has taken on the form of a religion – a secular animism. If this assessment is accurate, then it is surely an apocalyptic faith. And Gore is its bearded prophet, sent wandering in the desert by the Pharisees of Florida and a mere 537 votes.

Unfortunately for us, there must have been a film crew in Gore’s desert, as it has just made the motion picture, “An Inconvenient Truth.” The production is touted as “A Film About Global Warming, Presented By Al Gore” in which “Director Davis Guggenheim eloquently weaves the science of global warming with Mr. Gore’s personal history and lifelong commitment to reversing the effects of global climate change.”

Al Gore's Here. The World Can Climax Now.

You see, it’s a story of a message – and a messenger, one with a very, very important message: “THE END IS NEARER!” Global Warming, as an apocalyptic vision, had a major marketing flaw at its inception: it was a gradual phenomenon, as boring as Gore himself in its near tectonic speed. But that has all been solved now by the new revelation of the truth known as “the tipping point” – a time when all of the accumulating forces of Global Warming shall suddenly topple the existing climate in a horrendous and shocking moment of rapid and irreversible change.

We may only have 10 years before we reach the “tipping point,” when not even the prophet Gore will be able to save us. “Assuming that’s the dead-on truth,” Gore states, “then what does that mean to you? What are the implications?”

Well, it means that it’s a one-time only offer, I suppose. And we should act now, because supplies are limited and operators are standing by.

According to Gore, global warming is a “deepening global climate crisis that requires us to act boldly, quickly, and wisely.” (But mostly quickly and boldly.) It’s a “planetary emergency that now threatens human civilization on multiple fronts. Stronger hurricanes and typhoons represent only one of many new dangers as we begin what someone has called ‘a nature hike through the Book of Revelation.'”

Glaciers will melt, cities flood, crops will wither, deserts shall expand, and plagues of mosquitoes shall spread disease even as the expanding deserts dry up their breeding holes. Man will be turned against man, brother against brother, and nation against nation in a futile struggle for collapsing resources.

And that’s why we’re lucky! “As hard as it is to believe it,” Gore has commented, “we should see it as a privilege to be a part of this generation, to take on this challenge.” You see, because the alternative is to be insignificant people without a global rescue mission. You can only save the world if it’s dying, I suppose.

The science is settled, he declares. But that’s not important, because this is really “a moral moment – this is not about scientific debate or political dialogue, but about who we are.” I agree: for Al Gore, it’s all about who he is. He’s the man who saves the world. We’re just lucky he got here when he did.

© 2013 Energy Tribune

Scroll to top